I’m saying “excuse me” but I mean “why the fuck are u and ur friends fucking standing in the middle of the hallway blocking everyone what the fuck u fucker”
Strength is being able to crush a tomato.
Dexterity is being able to dodge a tomato.
Constitution is being able to eat a bad tomato.
Intelligence is knowing a tomato is a fruit.
Wisdom is knowing not to put a tomato in a fruit salad.
Charisma is being able to sell a tomato based fruit salad.
If I stop reblogging this assume I’m dead
IMAGINE BIOLUMINESCENT MERMAIDS
IMAGINE MERMAIDS WITH SYMBIOTIC RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHER ANIMALS
IMAGINE WHALE SIZED MERMAIDS IN THE ARCTIC CIRCLE
IMAGINE TINY TROPICAL SEAHORSE MERMAIDS
IMAGINE MERMAIDS WITH SCALES ALL OVER THEIR BODIES
IMAGINE SHARK MERMAIDS HUNTING WITH ACTUAL SHARKS
IMAGINE MERMAIDS THAT USE THEIR COLOR/TEXTURE FOR CAMOUFLAGE
IMAGINE JELLYFISH MERMAIDS
IMAGINE A SPERM WHALE MERMAID FIGHTING A GIANT SQUID MERMAID
Australian possum vs American possum 画
I had this exact conversation with an Australian friend. She was startled and said that oh, she must have just heard a possum outside her window.
Me: “OH GOD CLOSE YOUR WINDOW RIGHT NOW D:”
After an amusingly long circular conversation where she thought I was irrationally scared of the adorable little animal on the left, we figured out that we were discussing two very different animals. She sent me a picture, I awwed. Then I sent her a picture.
"WHAT IS THAT THING?!"
The last time I saw one that wasn’t roadkill, it was hissing at me from the shadows of a dark driveway I was walking past and I just bolted for a good hundred feet or so out of reflex.
This may be the only time the US wins in a head to head competition for scarier animals with Australia.
the one marsupial we do have, and it’s this fucking thing
There was a mix up and we got Australia’s Possum.
So…am I the only one who remembers The Origin of Donnie?
WHERE THE FUCK WAS I WHEN THIS HAPPENED!?
It was one of the saddest TV moments of my childhood! Donnie’s parents were originally very similar to Nigel and Mirianne. They befriended an orangutan mother and her son and taught them a single sign in sign-language: family. One day, poachers attached the orangutans. Donnie’s parents intervened and were killed for doing so. The villagers nearby sent their bodies to sea. Out of love and gratitude, the mother orangutan briefly ‘adopted’ Donnie, who was only a toddler. A year later, they stumbled across Nigel as he and the Thornberrys were filming. The orangutan decided that Donnie needed a human family and put Donnie in Nigel’s path. The Thornberrys, of course, adopted him, having personally known and respected his parents as great naturalists.
REMEMBER WHEN CARTOONS COULD DO THIS.
NOW THEY CAN’T EVEN FROWN FOR TOO LONG CAUSE KIDS “Won’t like that”